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Gotta love Pete!


Locklyn

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Now we all know Pete is a funny guy, but I guess I never knew just HOW funny he can be...untill I got this turns battle report of epic proportions....

Love you Pete!

 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

** NAVAL BATTLE REPORT **

 

----- ROMARI [ G (Yellow) 9 V ] [single Star] - Warp Point 95241 -----

 

The Genesian Gremloid Technocracy # 2060 (No Naval Commanders)

Total tonnage: 255,600.....Base Fire Control: 4 [1,025,000 bridge]

Hellenic League # 4991 (No Naval Commanders)

Total tonnage: 11,700.....Base Fire Control: 1 [4,000 bridge]

 

Undiscovered Country The Genesian Gremloid Technocr #2060 Ranger

 

------------------------------- ** Imperial Navy Report: Fleet Order of Battle ** ------------------------------------------

The Genesian Gremloid Technocracy # 2060 [black Phoenix Rising From Golden Egg On Red Trimmed With Purple]

 

Undiscovered Country [ROE: R] *Column Attack* (Fleet Tonnage: 255,600)

[Deploy Location 12] 1 FC ISS Naughty By Nature (Frontier Cruiser - 255,600 tons [each])

<40,660 Fuel>

------------------------------- ** Imperial Navy Report: Fleet Order of Battle ** -----------------------------------------

Hellenic League # 4991 [sailing Ship On A Blue Sea With A Shining Star Above]

 

Fleet 1015 [ROE: R] *Column Attack* (Fleet Tonnage: 11,700)

[Deploy Location 7] 1 FS Pathfinder II (Fleet Scout - 11,700 tons [each])

<1,112 Fuel>

 

** Battle Damage Assessment Report **

 

-------------------------------------------------- DepLoc 12 ------------------------------------------------------------

FC ISS Naughty By Nature (Frontier Cruiser - 255,600 tons) [integrity: 585,200 / 585,200] [shields: 63,999,464 /

64,000,000] (Green, Timid)

10 Fuel Shuttle, 50,000 Fuel Tankage, 25 Mk I Pursuit Missile, 128 Mk I Repulsor CIDS, 14 Mk II Heavy Missile

4 Mk II Pursuit Missile, 1 Mk III Standard Missile, 4 Mk IV Jump Survey Sensor, 5 Mk IV Long Lance Torpedo

256 Mk IX Force Shield, 41 Mk V Computer System, 183 Mk V Nuclear Engine, 375 Mk VI Nuclear Engine

1 Nuclear Transwarp Drive, 400 Tckon 68, 1 Type A Stasis Field Generator

Missile: 157,600

Black Sphere: 5.60 %, Deflectors: 5.60 %, Displacement: 5.60 %, ECM: 5.60 %, Field Stabilization: 5.60 %

Flux Capacitance: 5.60 %, Maneuverability: 14.60, Meson Web: 5.60 %, Molecular Pattern Stabilization: 5.60 %

Phase Inversion: 5.60 %, Missile Defense: 56.70 %, Reflective Coating: 5.60 %, Screens: 5.60 %

Sensors: 5.60 %, Tachyon Grid: 5.60 %, Thermal Regulation: 5.60 %

 

** Battle Damage Assessment Report **

 

-------------------------------------------------- DepLoc 7 ------------------------------------------------------------

**DESTROYED** [1st] FS Pathfinder II (Fleet Scout - 11,700 tons) [integrity: 0 / 13,700] (Green, Timid)

1 Fuel Shuttle, 2,000 Fuel Tankage, 1 Light Pressor Beam, 1 Mk I Nuclear Engine, 1 Mk I Nuclear Jump Drive

1 Mk II Computer System, 1 Mk II Jump Survey Sensor, 2,000 Standard Hull Plate, 1 Survey Lander

1 Type A Science Lab

Gravitonic: 880

Maneuverability: 0.03, Missile Defense: 0.40 %

 

----- Post-Battle Damage Assessment Report-----

 

Side 1

[12] 1 ISS Naughty By Natur class FC

 

Side 2

[7] 1 Pathfinder II class FS..................................................1 Destroyed

 

An Hellenic League Pathfinder II comes under fire from a hated Genesian Gremloid Technocracy Frontier Cruiser but

miraculously avoids the countless X-Ray Lasers, Disintegrators and even spinal weapons fire directed against it by the much

larger GGT vessel. Darting in and out of the enemy's weapons umbrella the Pathfinder II makes pass after daring pass,

picking apart the shields of the GGT ship until a devastating opening appears. The captain of the brave scout orders his

ship to charge in to deliver the killing blow with its powerful Light Pressor Beam, but at this moment one of his

lieutenants whispers to him that the view screens are in fact tuned to a video game currently being played by Petty Officer

Shblovnik in his quarters, who happens to be doing very well indeed in a game of Galactic Mayhem. Just as the screens are

reconfigured to show what is really happening, a full broadside of every missile and torpedo in the GGT ships' arsenal

impacts squarely on the Pathfinder II's bridge section, annihilating the hapless scout instantly, not to mention ruining

Petty Officer Shblovnik's high score……

================================================================================

=========================================

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:jawdrop::python:

 

 

:thumbsup::alien:

 

You know, I keep looking at this and I want an alternate ending. Something like this...

 

An Hellenic League Pathfinder II comes under fire from a hated Genesian Gremloid Technocracy Frontier Cruiser but miraculously avoids the countless X-Ray Lasers, Disintegrators and even spinal weapons fire directed against it by the much larger GGT vessel. Darting in and out of the enemy's weapons umbrella the Pathfinder II makes pass after daring pass, picking apart the shields of the GGT ship until a devastating opening appears. The captain of the brave scout orders his ship to charge in to deliver the killing blow with its powerful Light Pressor Beam.

 

Spinning around another barrage of Lasers and Disintegrators, the scout fires the pressor beam into the bridge of the GGT ship. With the bridge gone, the GGT ship starts to spin wildly out of control until it rips itself to pieces and explodes. At this moment the screen starts to flash "NEW HIGH SCORE" and the captain hears shouting behind him. Confused and a bit dazed, he turns towards the commotion to see Petty Officer Shblovnik dancing next to his seat. He keeps yelling something about his being #1 and he's so bad, all with hs battle helmet trailing wires back into the computer console. One of brdige lieutenants examining the systems mentions that it appears Shblovnik was playing a game of Galactic Mayhem at his station, and accidently overrode the brdiges systems. The lieutenant types in a few commands, and the systems and screens are reconfigured to bridge control, just in time to show a real GGT ship bearing down on them. Before the captain can even think "I've always hated that kid", a broadside of every missile and torpedo in the GGT ships' arsenal impacts squarely on the Pathfinder II, annihilating the hapless scout instantly, and eliminating all traces of Petty Officer Shblovnik's high score……

 

 

Yes ... I like this better. Shblovnik gets his high score, and the ship still goes boom. A happier ending for all .. right? :cheers:

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